“People underestimate how important and powerful the media is for young people who grow up watching a lot of television. Through the media, we’ve established this standard of what every human being should look up to: somebody who always looks right; who always has the right light on their face; never has bags under their eyes; never says anything inappropriate. Somebody who always somehow turns out perfect. I hate the fact that celebrities are supposedly a higher class of human being. That’s the way I felt growing up, and that’s the way I think a lot of people feel. So now that I’m in this position, I want to change things. I want to be like the patron saint of reality.”—Fiona Apple (via fionahaswings)
“Bloody tissues cover my bed
Insecure thoughts occupy my mind
Is it my fault?
Are they just blind?
Should they just let it be?
If I were treated like a human being maybe this wouldn’t be.
They Don’t care.
Instead, they just let it manifest inside of me”—An original by me
My friend Alexis and my used to be friend was there because they decided that since I didn’t to go out she was going to bring the party to me. We ended up getting fucked up outside late at night. Me and my other friend started making out while Alexis fell asleep. He ended up taking my pants semi off under the blanket we brought outside with us and he felt my thighs. His response was that I should stop feeling sorry for myself. On top of that, he’s now trying to convince Alexis that those words were never said…. I was drunk, but I was NOT that drunk.
I love the feeling of a fresh razor blade. It’s still sharp enough that I can barely drag it across my skin and bleed a significant amount but especially when I’m in that state of mind I don’t pay attention to the pressure I’m putting on the blade. Sometimes I hope that I’ll lose control and end it all and not have to worry about things, not have to clean them, not have to fight every day of my life, and lastly not have to be the one who ruins everything.